A Fine Line Between Scary and Funny

In the spirit of Halloween, some of my girlfriends and I decided we would pay homage to the eerie classics and held our own version of 'old school' scary movie night. Friday the 13th, circa 1980, was at the top of the list. It had been years (and years) since I had seen it; must have blocked it out entirely because, hello, didn't remember Kevin Bacon being in the movie. The guy really is only separated six degrees from everything, even Jason Voorhees! What I did remember from the movie, though, was the sound effects. You know, 'ooh, ooh, ahh, ahh, ahh'? For those of us who have a cinematic aversion to scary movies all together, I appreciate the 5-syllable warning; at least I know when someone is going to get the axe, or the knife, or the frying pan...wait, wait a minute, the frying pan? Okay, seriously, how scary is that? Does that really deserve the creepy crescendo? Nah. But, if I had been in charge of which scenes were worthy of warning, there were a few where I needed a quick second to cover my mouth - to muffle the screams of laughter: the one where the counselors are in tube socks, Chuckie T's, and white plastic belts; the below-the-waist shot of K.Bake in his speedo; when the chick loses her clothes in strip Monopoly and instead of putting them back on heads out into the rain wearing nothing but a child-size raincoat and no shoes; or, when Jason's mom starts talking like an 8-year old boy. You see, that's why I don't watch scary movies...they're just too funny.

LMN

It Was A Hit!

My hair dryer was a victim of a MOB (aka Majorly Overworked Blowdryers) hit this morning. To its credit, it went out in a blaze of glory - firing at every outlet in my bathroom and bedroom before giving in to the MOB's demand: early retirement. After all these years, being overheated and under-rewarded for its 'mane'aculous accomplishments and loyalty, it finally blew its last blow...and unfortunately, what a blow to my ego it was. I actually had to sit in front of a fan to attempt to dry this blonde mop and then, had to venture out in public looking like a wet dog, or should I say rat? Hmmm....
I guess humiliation, not to mention pneumonia, are the least of my worries because I have this gut feeling that today was just the beginning. First the hair dryer; tomorrow, the curling iron gets whacked. It's already showing weakness and in organized hair care, weakness just doesn't curl it.

LMN

Gone Gucci Gone

For those of us who are label lovers, fashion is a religion. We worship the one-name gods – Marc, Michael, Oscar, Carolina, Chanel (drifts off in wonder…). Developing our fashion aesthetic has taken years of soul searching, personality analysis, and okay, let’s be honest, figure obsessing. Through those years, we have accumulated more than fabric; we have collected wearable pieces of art. So, you can imagine my shared horror and outrage when my best friend called to tell me the news: when picking up her dry cleaning, she realized that of all the items in her bag the one conveniently ‘missing’ happened to be a treasured Gucci blouse. And not just any Gucci blouse. This one was THE blouse – the one that hugged all the right spots, accentuated all the right parts, and to add insult to injury, was proudly rescued at a last-call sale at Neiman Marcus. It couldn’t have been the stupid Ann Taylor button-down to bite the bullet, or the used-to-be-black-but-now-a-faded-charcoal-looking-color pair of pants that is too tight anyway? No, of course not; it had to be the holy grail of the bunch. Conspiracy theories arose and the thought of theft crossed her mind. After an exchange of words and a day, the blouse was miraculously found and returned unharmed. Yes, one might beg, borrow, or buy to satisfy a designer addiction, but to steal? C’mon…the thought alone is just sacrilegious.

LMN

Occupational Hazard?

It took me starting a blog to experience my first bout of writer's block and I have to say...it's quite frustrating. I'm not accustomed to unlimited word counts, free reign of topics, and no editor input/feedback (gasp!). This freedom is almost too liberating! Perhaps in my case, this is more of 'shock block' than just the pure absence of words, or so I'm telling myself. With that said, I welcome this blogging adventure and as I find my words (or they find me), I promise to share.

LMN